Should You Get Back With Your Ex Quiz – If you are thinking of trying your best to try and get your ex back, remember that your ex is not a damsel in distress, waiting for you to try to win her back. Assuming your ex is the dumper, your ex is relieved about the breakup and enjoying the new life after the breakup.
Your ex focuses solely on his or her wants and needs and will reject you and hurt you if you try to reconcile on your terms. This is inevitable because you will trigger your ex’s self-defense mechanism whose job is to repel any attack that threatens his or her independence and well-being.
Should You Get Back With Your Ex Quiz
In other words, your words and actions will overload your ex with high expectations and push your ex to the other side of the planet.
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If you were dumped by someone you love, don’t instinctively run back to your ex. As the phrase is overused, understand that there is no such thing as “getting an ex back.” An ex is not a sack of potatoes that you can toss around from one place to another whenever you want.
Your ex is a person with beliefs, feelings, preferences, and certain ways of thinking and behaving, which means your ex thought long and hard before dumping you and getting some breathing space.
And if your ex has thought long and hard before dumping you, your ex will therefore have to think long and hard before expressing regret and “dumping” you. That’s just the way it is, since the breakup has given your ex a lot of unpleasant feelings after the breakup, which your ex now has to work through.
If you try to force your ex to be ready sooner and present a plan on how to get back together, don’t expect your ex to open his arms to you and take you back with a smile on his face.
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Expect your ex to feel trapped, guilty, repulsed – and soon become cold, mean and angry. How could your ex not feel and act that way when your ex had spent weeks or months preparing to leave the relationship only for you to demand time, security and love?
Look, there’s always a chance your ex won’t react badly. Your ex may be an extremely self-aware, mature person who has mastered the art of emotion. But even if your ex has become the next Buddha, that doesn’t mean your ex will miss you romantically the moment you come out of hiding. Your ex will probably just miss you as a friend and an ex-partner he or she got to know on an intimate level.
Always remember that your ex would have come back by now if he or she had seen your value as a romantic partner. Your ex wouldn’t let you go simply out of pride or because you didn’t try to get him/her back.
Dumpers who break up with the intention of seeing their ex chase them end up chasing their ex in the end. This is because they still have feelings for their ex and get their egos crushed when they see that their ex doesn’t care about them.
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So if it’s been weeks and you haven’t heard a peep from your ex, try to accept that the relationship is over and that it needs to go through certain stages of recovery.
While you need to heal and get yourself back, your ex needs to process stifling emotions and realize that he or she made a big mistake. And that can only happen if you maintain your dignity and prove that you have what it takes to be happy with or without your ex.
In this post, we will talk about the pros and cons of getting back with an ex. We will try to help you decide if you should even try to get back with your ex.
If you’re a dumpee and you got hit with a breakup, obviously you shouldn’t go back to your ex for another smack. It is extremely unlikely that your ex has become open to getting back together during the time apart and that he or she is waiting for you to make the first move.
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If your ex is open to giving it another chance and just waiting, know that your ex’s motivation to get back together is not strong enough. It is weak, meaning that even if you call your ex and reconcile, your ex’s lack of emotion and poor commitment to the relationship will soon cause another breakup.
I’m no fortune teller, but I know that when the dumper has a “meh” relationship mentality, he or she can’t connect with the dumper. The dumper cannot do that because he or she sees no reason to invest in the dumpee and remain committed.
This means reaching for the dump truck is a bad idea. Not only would you be reaching out before your ex realizes your worth, but you would also be giving your ex a chance to disappoint you and hurt you.
You should only consider getting back with your ex if you are the dumper or if your ex has made it clear that he or she wants you back. Those are the only two scenarios where getting back with an ex is even possible. Any other scenario is likely to lead to more pain and suffering.
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If you are a dumpee and feel the need to get your ex back, now you know that you don’t have to lift a finger to get your ex back. When your ex discovers your worth and wants to be a part of your life again, your ex will do all the work he or she needs to do.
Your ex will reach out, apologize, ask you out, compliment you and ask to get back together. All you have to do until that happens is be patient and wait for your ex to realize that he or she was a fool to dump you.
As hard as it is, avoid making highly emotional decisions and be strong enough to resist the urge to chase your ex. Chasing is extremely harmful to your health as it will make you more anxious and desperate to be together with your ex.
If you are afraid of not being with your ex, know that you want your ex back for the right reasons. You want to be with your ex because you panic and think that your ex is the only person in this world who can make you happy.
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That would mean reconciliation is the last thing on your mind. You should first find out why the breakup happened and then turn your attention to people and things that will help you out of the misery you have found yourself in.
Some dumpees are also broken up with because they don’t have a life outside of the relationship and are codependent. Such dumpees should not get back with their ex until they figure out why they are emotionally dependent on other people for happiness.
And even after they figure out the reasons and fix them, it may still be better for them not to reconcile because there is a chance that their ex’s return will cause their post-breakup fears and insecurities to resurface .
Getting back with an ex is okay, but dumpees need to resolve their personal issues and find ways to see their ex as an equal. If they continue to see their ex as a megastar, they are not fixing anything. They are still obsessed with their ex and as a result they are wasting their chance to detach and grow in ways that they need to.
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However, if you are not the dumper, but the dumper, then you are in control of the breakup and decide whether or not you want to be with your ex. You need to weigh the pros and cons and figure out if the relationship dynamic can be improved next time.
If you had a connection with your ex before, it is more than possible to reconnect and fall in love. But before you focus on that, you should first resolve your issues, improve your perception of your ex, and give your ex his or her power back. You basically have to invest in yourself and discern that you want your ex back for the right reasons – because you value your ex and want to give and receive love.
If you want your ex back just because someone dumped you, that might not be enough to stay committed to your ex after the pain of rejection wears off. Of course it could be, but only if you process the breakup and understand emotionally and rationally that your ex is the right person for you.
That being said, here are a few points that will help you decide if you should try to get your ex back as a dumpee and as a dumper.
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Since you and your ex broke up, the unfortunate truth is that right now it doesn’t matter why you fell in love with each other. Things like mutual interests and chemistry won’t help you stay together. They will give you something to bond over, but they will not correct your incompatibilities and
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