Can You Still Be Friends With Your Ex – Don’t give up completely if you and your ex aren’t ready to give the relationship another chance. Maybe it’s possible to stay friends. Especially if your ex misses your friendship and support.
You cannot become friends with your ex overnight. This is because your brain sees a romantic relationship as a necessity for survival. As such, your brain goes crazy after an unwanted breakup and needs time to adjust. And you’re not ready for friendship until it happens.
Can You Still Be Friends With Your Ex
Also, exes can’t be friends until they both accept the loss. You can’t be friends if one of you is still attached.
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First, figure out what you hope to gain from being friends with your ex. Are you looking for someone to support you and help you get through difficult times? Or do you just want to maintain friendly relations with your ex? Take some time to think about what you hope to gain from contacting your ex-boyfriend or girlfriend.
Once you know your reason, you can test the water to see if your ex wants to be friends too.
If you haven’t been in touch with your ex since the breakup, you’ll need to reconnect before you can mend fences.
If you have mutual friends, introduce yourself. If not, send a text to ask how they’re doing and say you’d like to chat sometime. Your ex will most likely know what the subtext is. For some people, it’s not even a subtext—at some point, they’ll expect this kind of communication from an ex-lover.
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If you feel they are interested in reconnecting, set up a time to meet in person. It’s still just a casual meeting between two friends – no pressure, just catching up over coffee or lunch. If the reaction is lukewarm at best, take a break and give your ex more time. However, if the interest becomes friendly again, bet on this small win.
For most people, sending a text message will work best. Don’t think about it. Just test the waters by sending your ex a text asking how things are and what they’ve been up to lately. Do they seem open and receptive? Great. Now you can turn to more innocuous conversation topics like movies, books, and music instead of trying to figure out the details of a painful breakup.
If it goes well, I suggest asking your ex to talk to you when you both have some time off. You can meet in a cafe or a bar – come up with places that won’t bring back bad memories for either of you.
Once you’ve established a connection, you’ll need to watch out for jealousy and manage your expectations.
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Jealousy can be a big problem for some. It’s normal to feel some anxiety when your ex starts dating after your breakup. Yet, if this anxiety gets out of control, it can destroy any hope of a cordial relationship.
The best way to minimize the effects of jealousy is to make sure you don’t overreact. Because over time you will refine your perspective on the situation and become less jealous. If you know you’re prone to jealousy, definitely sit back and don’t share your feelings about your ex’s new relationships right from the start.
The next thing you need to do is manage your expectations about this friendship. For example, let’s say you’re still in love with your ex. In that case, no matter what situation arises, it will be difficult for you to deal with it objectively. Know thyself.
Being friends with an ex can be tricky. Especially if you weren’t friends before. And even more so if you broke up on bad terms. Being friends with your ex is likely to be a challenge for you. While friendship won’t work for everyone, for those that do, it can be your most valuable friendship.
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One obvious advantage is that your ex probably knows you better than any of your other friends. Therefore, you can open up to your ex about almost anything, including personal things that you wouldn’t even share with your best friend.
If you and your ex can become friends without any weird hangups, you can have a perfect friendship.
The biggest trick to staying friends with your ex is to not be weird about who they’re dating. After all, it’s hard to see your ex enjoying the company of other men and women. And while your ex will naturally want to talk about their new boyfriend or girlfriend with their friends, that doesn’t have to include you. At least not to begin with.
And yet in time these matters will practically disappear, until one day you will both laugh at what a big deal was made of such matters.
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You probably have a lot in common with the person you dated. You share similar interests, behaviors and even physical characteristics. It’s only natural to wonder if the friendship is healthy for you.
The answer will be YES if you are both honest and want the best for the other. And of course it helps not to hold grudges against the past…
It’s normal to still be in love with your ex after a breakup. After all, when a relationship ends, feelings continue for some time. You won’t stop having sudden feelings. However, being friends with an ex you still love
If you still love your ex and dream of getting them back, you need to be honest with yourself and decide if this is your plan (rather than just being friends). If so, you should question whether breaking up was the right decision and go from there.
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However, if you have accepted the breakup and accept that it will take some time for the feelings to subside, then a friendship can work.
I’ve created a free “thing” that will give you “ah ha!” customized next step instructions to help you get your ex back.
Hello. it is not luxurious. But based on your situation, you will be presented with a “prescription” of what to do next.
About the Author: Michael Fulmer is a breakup recovery counselor and relationship coach. It issues the Ex-Communication newsletter to mailboxes around the world. He also runs a Breakup Dojo where he teaches you the right steps to take to outwit your ex’s negative feelings. Michael has been canceling breakups since 2011. No fancy suits, videos or fake smiling photos. You won’t find Michael on Youtube either. One of the biggest issues after a breakup is deciding – ‘Should you be friends with your ex?’
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In fact, this is one of the most common questions I get from clients who can’t decide whether to be friends with an ex and understand the consequences of their choice. Trust me, it’s not an easy decision if you’ve been with your partner for a long time and have gotten used to each other’s presence. So much so that even if you have decided to separate for good, you and your partner may still consider the idea of staying in each other’s lives to ease the transition. But the problem is that it can complicate things!
So I thought I’d dedicate this post to help you figure out the WHEN BUT AND WHY of being friends with your ex – what you need to know, why you should care, and most importantly, what should you do next?
Whether you want to be friends with your ex because you secretly still love them or because you really feel that there is absolutely nothing wrong with it, here is the raw naked truth about “friending your ex”!
These are people who desperately want their ex back and can’t deal with him not talking to them. So they would even put up with being friends with their ex just so they could still have some part of them in their lives. They’re okay with being demoted to just friends because that’s the next best thing. Surprisingly, there are a lot of people who fall into this category.
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They are so hung up on their ex that they tend to be stuck in limbo for the longest time. While they may date other people and pretend everything is fine, their heart is still with their ex and it will be difficult for them to invest in other relationships.
These are the guys and girls who know deep down that their heart is already taken. And that could mean a lot of silent suffering about their true feelings.
The second group of people are now about ‘convenience’. These are the ones who, at least outwardly, appear to benefit the most from the situation.
They just like to enjoy the partial “benefits” of a relationship minus the “liabilities” portion. They happily call their ex in the wee hours of the morning, or just to vent about their day or complain about work. And yes, sometimes they’ll want to spoon, watch Netflix, and fall into bed together (isn’t that part of being “friends” with someone?)
Why Is My Ex Hanging Out With My Friends?
Basically, they want to act
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